Wednesday, July 22, 2009

NC Summer '09: of what i can remember about winston

after having to drop cargo to get the plane off the ground to accommodate to my needs, i left north carolina. i arrived in vancouver only to be in the library full time to write two papers for my book of Daniel class. success! i wrote two 10 pages papers in 5 days. (research, writing, everything). unfortunately i didnt have time to do the wanted illustrations for the papers. maybe next time. after turning those in, i had a couple days to catch my breathe. this was when i wrote part one of the NC adventures. immediately after that, i was full time in the library as well writing my two papers for theology of culture. success. finished on time!

NOW, im free until my next class starting the 27th. so i have time to write in my private journal inconveniently published on a public internet websitepage on a dot com. so i might just have to write about a couple highlights in NC because i have the short term memory of a goldfish.

WINSTON-SALEM:

winston was great because i got to ride my premium cafe racer. 1964 triumph bonneville t120r. riding that around town was so great and i can hardly explain the feeling of riding something that you built from the ground up. flying down the highway knowing that ive touched and tasted every bolt on that machine is both exhilarating and completely terrifying because im not a professional so i could explode without warning. well i guess my amateur mechanic abilities would be warning enough...

winston was full of hanging out with friends and family. erik and i surpassed our rom com quota with ease. for those that dont know what a rom com is, well its the movie genre: romantic comedy.

if i remember correctly, erik loves the rom coms over the com roms but the com roms beat out the rom drams however the com drams would be a strong contender if they hadnt died out in the late 90s.

erik and i (buddies for life):





























me, erik, blake, stacey:



















garrett wasnt there that evening but i cant forget him because i got to hang with him a lot. this is garrett. i dont know what hes doing in this picture...but note that he thinks covering 10% of his shirt is good enough to protect the whole thing:






























unfortunately i cant remember any specific adventure but i do remember having an awesome 100% of the time with all my friends.

oh wait, in winston, i ran into my friend rachel who i went to high school with. she was getting married so my friend patrick and i decided to join their bachelorette party. we fit it well. it was good to hang with some of my high school buddies that i hadnt seen in a while.

here is sarada, me, katie, patrick, kristen, rachel:



















they were playing some bachelorette card game that had 'dares' or some odd request on each card. i didnt really know this until from across the bar i hear from rachels mouth, "GRAHAM!! how would you like to spank your mother!?"

appalled i was.

but then i realized what she meant. in high school, rachel was the girl that looked after us with a motherly love SO i called her 'mom'. and no she didnt constantly spank me when i misbehaved in high school BUT this night, she wanted me to spank her. at first, i thought she had lost her mind but she explained that the card told her to. and as we all know, we can never not do something that a little card tells us to do. just a rule of life really.

i decided to give her the whole 'sympathetic dad' routine by telling her that "this is going to hurt me more than it will hurt you". well let me tell you.

my joke turned into a reality when i was crying the entire time i open hand slapped her fanny. (the 'fanny' part will only be hilarious to people from the UK or australia as 'fanny' means something completely different than the innocent north american definition of someone's rear end)

now, those that know me personally (hopefully john milbank soon), know that though i feel emotions, i do NOT cry. so when i say that i was crying when i spanked my 'mom', suspicion arises from the validity of the story. well children of modernity, i have EMPIRICAL evidence that will prove the said event:






























i cried. she laughed. well everyone laughed. except my real mom upon viewing this picture. im sure i will get a nice little email about decency and chivalry soon. awesome.

"graham! i cant believe you would disgrace our family by letting your hand graze a woman's fanny! i have developed a 5 point essay about common decency for the 21st century called 'janice's tips on finding the donna reed in all of us'..."

ill make sure to post the email when i get it.

OH!!! speaking of emails, i got one from my mother explaining the whole 'all the way' incident.
my email to her:

"hey mom,

remember that first night i was back in NC when you, dad, martha, and i were eating at midtown cafe and were messing with that waitress. and you said, "he dated the owners daughter....they went all the way". now according to the standard definition of 'all the way', katie and i DIDNT have sex...much less kissed. SO as ive been telling this hilarious story to my friends, im trying to figure out what you meant by 'all the way' because even if you did know the definition, and the circumstances were true, i know you would NEVER share that information in a public conversation so nonchalantly. SOOOO clearly you have another definition of 'all the way' and im curious to what you mean.

love, graham"

her response:

"Oh Graham
I am so sorry that you are telling the Midtown waitress story with miscontrued information. I NEVER said that you and Katie went "all the way!" My gosh, I would never say that to anyone.....plus, I would be COMATOSE if I thought y'all went all the way in the 8th grade....
What I said was that "y'all went all the way back to grade school!! However, with the interrupters we have in our family, that last part of my sentence probably never made it out; and if it did, it was probably drowned out by these rude family interrupters and critics. Does this make sense? Golly, next time I say something that you think is out of character for me, PLEASE ask me about it so that you don't misquote me or even worse, get the wrong impression of me.
Love, Mom
PS. My definition of "all the way" is the same as yours."

well im glad we got that cleared up. however not before i saw katie during rachel's bachelorette party and told her what my mom said. we had a good laugh.

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